The Person You Mean to Be: Summary Review
This is a summary review of The Person You Mean to Be containing key details about The Person You Mean to Be.
What is The Person You Mean to Be About?
"The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias" is a book by Dolly Chugh, a social psychologist and professor at New York University's Stern School of Business.
In The Person You Mean to Be, the author reveals the surprising causes of inequality, grounded in the "psychology of good people". Using her research findings in unconscious bias as well as work across psychology, sociology, economics, political science, and other disciplines, she offers practical tools to respectfully and effectively talk politics with family, to be a better colleague to people who don’t look like you, and to avoid being a well-intentioned barrier to equality. Being the person we mean to be starts with a look at ourselves.
Summary Points & Takeaways from The Person You Mean to Be
Some key summary points and takeaways from the book include:
* Understanding the impact of unconscious bias: Chugh argues that everyone is susceptible to unconscious biases, and that it is important to understand how these biases impact our thoughts, feelings, and actions.
* The importance of being an "everyday ally": Chugh argues that individuals can play a critical role in combating bias by being "everyday allies" who challenge and confront biased thinking and behavior in their own lives.
* The role of "moral courage" in fighting bias: Chugh argues that it takes "moral courage" to challenge one's own biases and to speak out against bias in others, and she offers practical advice for developing this type of courage.
* The power of "small wins" in promoting change: Chugh argues that small, everyday actions can have a big impact in promoting positive change and challenging bias, and she encourages individuals to start with small steps and build from there.
* The importance of self-reflection and self-awareness: Chugh emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and self-awareness in understanding and challenging one's own biases, and she offers practical exercises for developing this type of self-awareness.
* The role of community and collaboration in promoting change: Chugh argues that collective action and collaboration are essential in promoting positive change and fighting bias, and she encourages individuals to work together to create a more inclusive and equitable world.
* The book is a thought-provoking and inspiring guide to understanding and combating bias, and it offers practical strategies for becoming an "everyday ally" in the fight against bias.
Who is the author of The Person You Mean to Be?
Dr. Dolly Chugh is a Harvard educated, award-winning social psychologist at the NYU Stern School of Business, where she is an expert in the unconscious biases and unethical behavior of ordinary, good people.
The Person You Mean to Be Summary Notes
Summary Note: Overcoming Fixed Mindsets and Prejudices: The Power of Growth Mindset
One of the main themes revolves around the concept of growth mindset and how it can lead to amazing things, while fixed mindsets can result in stubborn prejudices that prevent personal and societal growth. The author uses the example of documentary filmmaker Perrin Chiles, who embraced a growth mindset when he chose to explore the subject of autism despite having little knowledge about it. This mindset led to the creation of a powerful documentary called Autism: The Musical, which touched millions of people and raised awareness about the realities of autism.
The author explains that having a growth mindset means being willing to learn, to acknowledge weaknesses and believe in the potential for improvement with effort and practice. On the other hand, a fixed mindset is characterized by a belief that one's abilities are fixed and cannot be changed, leading to limitations and missed opportunities for growth.
The author also highlights the negative impact of fixed mindsets on society, using the example of prejudices in Hollywood movies. Despite progress in recent years, there is still a lack of representation and diversity in the film industry, with limited roles for women, people of color, and individuals with disabilities. These biases and prejudices are deeply ingrained and hard to overcome, often perpetuated by fixed mindsets that resist change and perpetuate narrow-mindedness.
The author emphasizes the importance of challenging and changing fixed mindsets, both at an individual and societal level. By embracing a growth mindset, we can open ourselves to new perspectives, experiences, and opportunities for learning and growth. It requires self-awareness, openness, and a willingness to confront and challenge our biases and prejudices.
Summary Note: Unconscious Bias and Measuring the Results
Unconscious bias, or the unintentional discrimination and prejudicial beliefs that people may hold without being aware of them, can now be measured through methods such as the Implicit Association Test (IAT). Studies have shown that the majority of information we process, around 99.999 percent, is done unconsciously, including our biases. The IAT, developed by Harvard psychologists, assesses the extent of an individual's unconscious biases by measuring their rapid reactions to questions that tap into their unconscious associations. Many participants, including those who identify as progressives and support equality, have been shocked by their IAT results, revealing biases they were not consciously aware of.
The IAT has revealed biases related to gender and race, with participants showing conservative-minded biases despite their conscious beliefs. For example, about 75 percent of participants showed a bias associating women with nurturing and household activities, and men with careers and work, even if they identified as supporters of gender equality. Similarly, 85 percent of white Americans associated black people with dangerous objects such as knives and guns, revealing a racial bias that they were not consciously aware of.
These results highlight the unconscious nature of biases and the challenges of overcoming them. Despite our conscious beliefs and intentions, our unconscious biases can influence our perceptions and behaviors towards others. The ability to measure unconscious bias provides an opportunity for individuals and organizations to increase their awareness of these biases and take steps towards addressing them. It requires a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths about our own biases and make conscious efforts to challenge and change them.
Summary Note: Acknowledging Privilege Can Be Challenging Without Positive Reinforcement
The concept of privilege, particularly in terms of race and socio-economic status, has gained increasing attention in recent years. However, acknowledging one's own privilege can be challenging for many individuals. Research has shown that people tend to discount their privileges unless they are given something positive to focus on.
A study conducted by Stanford psychologists in 2015 revealed that when white Americans were reminded of their privilege, they actually emphasized the difficulties they faced in their childhood more. This suggests that people may accept that others are disadvantaged while disregarding the advantages they themselves have had. This phenomenon may be attributed to the fear that acknowledging privilege could make one's achievements appear unearned or undeserved.
Similar trends were observed in the workplace, where employees with high salaries and benefits tended to emphasize the effort and difficulty of their jobs after being reminded of their perks. However, interestingly, when individuals were given a positive achievement to focus on, such as reflecting on past accomplishments or receiving positive feedback, they were more likely to recognize their privilege when asked about their childhoods.
This research highlights the importance of positive reinforcement when discussing privilege with others. Simply reminding individuals of their privilege may not be enough, as it can trigger a defensive response. However, by providing positive feedback or recognition of their achievements, individuals may be more open to acknowledging their privilege and understanding the role it has played in their lives.
Summary Note: Unconscious biases are often subtle and pervasive, and it takes work to overcome them.
Unconscious biases are deeply ingrained attitudes and beliefs that influence our thoughts and actions without us even realizing it. They can be subtle, pervasive, and have a significant impact on our interactions with others. In this passage, the author shares examples of unconscious biases and how they can manifest in everyday situations.
The first example is about Kimberly Davis, an African American executive who attended a convention for female executives. Despite being in a room full of white women, she felt excluded and attributed it to the unconscious biases of the other attendees who may not have recognized her as a fellow executive due to her race. This illustrates how unconscious biases can shape our perceptions of others, even in professional settings.
The second example is about Joe Lentine, a white man who grew up near Detroit but had little to no interaction with people of other races. He only realized the extent of his racial bias when he bonded with a black member of his college fraternity. This example highlights how unconscious biases can be deeply ingrained and may require proactive efforts to overcome.
The passage also emphasizes that addressing unconscious biases takes conscious effort. Lentine made a deliberate effort to immerse himself in foreign cultures and later took steps to promote diversity and inclusion in his workplace and community. It serves as a reminder that we can actively work towards addressing our unconscious biases and creating a more inclusive environment.
The main theme of this passage is that unconscious biases are pervasive and often subtle, but with awareness and effort, they can be addressed and overcome. It highlights the importance of self-reflection, recognizing our biases, and taking proactive steps to challenge and change them. By acknowledging and addressing our unconscious biases, we can strive to be better individuals and create a more inclusive and equitable society.
Summary Note: The Power of Privilege: Countering Unconscious Biases and Supporting Minorities
Unconscious biases are pervasive and can be countered by those with privilege, such as white individuals in positions of power, to support minorities and promote diversity. Research has shown that objections to racist statements are taken more seriously when they come from white people, rather than people of color, due to the association of privilege with power. This is especially relevant in the workplace, where white male executives are often perceived positively regardless of their success in creating diverse teams, while women and minority executives are more likely to be criticized. Additionally, white males have the ability to hire without fear of negative scrutiny, while women and minorities may face criticism for hiring individuals from their own communities. As a result, those with privilege, such as white males, have a greater responsibility to actively counter unconscious biases and promote diversity.
The idea that privileged individuals have a greater role in addressing unconscious biases and supporting minorities is a crucial one. Often, people of color are burdened with the responsibility of confronting racism, but research shows that objections to racist behavior are more effective when coming from white individuals. This highlights the importance of leveraging privilege to actively counter unconscious biases and promote inclusive environments. In the workplace, white male executives are in a unique position of power, as they are often perceived positively regardless of their actions. This underscores the need for these individuals to proactively promote diversity within their teams and organizations, as they have the ability to enact change without fear of negative repercussions.
Furthermore, the hiring practices of privileged individuals can also have a significant impact on diversity in the workplace. While white males can hire individuals from diverse backgrounds without facing criticism, women and minority executives may face scrutiny for hiring individuals who share their own identities. This double standard perpetuates unconscious biases and reinforces the need for those with privilege to actively challenge these biases through inclusive hiring practices.
Summary Note: Embracing the Three Stages of Racial Identity Consciousness
In the book, the importance of recognizing and embracing the three stages of racial identity consciousness is highlighted. Using the example of author Jodi Picoult's journey, the stages of denial, acceptance, and deeper understanding are discussed in the context of changing one's awareness of racial identity.
The first stage is denial, where individuals may refuse to believe they have any prejudices and may even deny the existence of racism. However, this belief needs to be challenged and corrected over time. The second stage is acceptance, where individuals take active measures to recognize their biases and acknowledge that racism does exist. This is a crucial stage where self-reflection and learning take place.
The third stage is deeper understanding, where individuals begin to grasp that their experience of racial identity is different from that of people of color. They question their own racial identity and its influence on their life. It's important to note that these stages are not linear and may require time and effort to navigate through.
The temptation to skip straight to acceptance can be strong, as confronting one's own denial and biases can be uncomfortable. However, it's crucial to go through all three stages to truly develop racial identity consciousness and make lasting changes. Avoiding examining closely or turning away from the reality of racism in society can hinder progress.
Research also shows that strong beliefs, such as being opposed to child labor or advocating for equality, can sometimes lead to overlooking the reality of how products are made or the prevalence of racism in society. Therefore, it's important to stay aware and not shy away from confronting uncomfortable truths.
Summary Note: It is not helpful to pretend to be color-blind or to categorize people in any way.
In this main idea, the concept of being color-blind or categorizing people based on race is explored. While some may think that being color-blind, or not seeing people in terms of color, is a noble stance, research suggests otherwise. A study conducted by Harvard University researchers showed that when white participants in black-white pairs pretended to be color-blind, their black partners perceived them as more racist, not less. This suggests that ignoring or denying the reality of race can be detrimental to building positive relationships and addressing racial biases.
Furthermore, categorizing people based on race, even if the intention is positive, can be harmful. Stereotypes, such as assuming that certain races possess specific qualities or behaviors, can limit an individual's individuality and perpetuate harmful biases. For example, assuming that Asian people are hard-working or wealthy can impact decisions related to financial aid or job opportunities, based solely on these stereotypes.
The key takeaway from this idea is that pretending to be color-blind or categorizing people based on race is not helpful in fostering inclusivity and addressing racial biases. It is important to acknowledge and appreciate the diversity of races and cultures, rather than denying or ignoring them. Treating people as individuals and avoiding assumptions based on race can lead to more positive and inclusive interactions, and promote a more equitable society. It is essential to be aware of our biases, challenge stereotypes, and strive towards building a more inclusive world where everyone is seen and valued as unique individuals, regardless of their race or ethnicity.
Summary Note: To Foster Inclusion in Companies, Listen to All Voices and Share Credit Honestly.
In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to get distracted and not truly listen to others. However, if we want to create truly inclusive companies, it's essential to actively listen and ensure that every voice is heard, especially those of minorities who are at high risk of being ignored. Unconscious biases can play a significant role in shaping our perception of others, and it's crucial to be mindful of these biases in our workplaces.
Research has shown that people tend to favor advice from white men over other voices, such as those of black or Latino individuals. This unconscious bias can lead to the exclusion of minority voices and perpetuate inequalities in the workplace. To combat this, we should actively seek out and listen to diverse perspectives, making sure that everyone has an equal opportunity to contribute and be heard.
Another important aspect of fostering inclusion is giving credit where it's due. Studies have shown that people tend to give themselves more credit than an objective supervisor would, while giving others less credit than they deserve. This bias can also impact minority voices, as they may receive less credit from their peers on group projects due to unconscious biases.
To address this, it's crucial to be mindful of who is receiving credit for work and ensure that credit is given to everyone who deserves it, regardless of their background. Being honest and transparent in sharing credit can help create a culture of inclusivity where everyone feels valued and recognized for their contributions.
Book details
- Print length: 325 pages
- Genre: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology
What are the chapters in The Person You Mean to Be?
Chapter 1. Stumbling upward
Chapter 2. One of the "good guys"
Chapter 3. If you are not part of the problem, you cannot be part of the solution
Chapter 4. Knowing it when you don't see it
Chapter 5. The power of ordinary privilege
Chapter 6. Keep your eyes open, anyway
Chapter 7. Look out for these four "good" intentions
Chapter 8. Be inclusive
Chapter 9. Steer the conversation
Chapter 10. Educate and occasionally confront others
Chapter 11. Show meaningful support
What is a good quote from The Person You Mean to Be?
Top Quote: “Equality says we treat everyone the same, regardless of headwinds or tailwinds. Equity says we give people what they need to have the same access and opportunities as others, taking into account the headwinds they face, which may mean differential treatment for some groups.” (Meaning) - The Person You Mean to Be Quotes, Dolly Chugh
What do critics say?
Here's what one of the prominent reviewers had to say about the book: “Dolly Chugh applies the power of a growth mindset to work on equity and inclusion at a time when it is much-needed. The Person You Mean to Be is essential reading.” — Carol Dweck, bestselling author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
* The editor of this summary review made every effort to maintain information accuracy, including any published quotes, chapters, or takeaways. If you're interested in enhancing your personal growth, I suggest checking out my list of favorite self-development books. These books have been instrumental in my own personal development and I'm confident they can help you too.
Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.
