We can make external conditions fit our goals, or we can change our experience of external conditions. The latter is in your full control.
Imagine you're on a ship sailing through stormy seas. The waves crash against the hull, the wind howls, and the sky darkens with clouds. It's easy to feel helpless, at the mercy of the elements. Yet, amidst this chaos, there's a profound truth hidden in the turbulence: you have the power to navigate not just the ship, but also your own experience of the storm.
Life often feels like those stormy seas, tossing us about with its unpredictability and challenges. We're constantly confronted with external conditions that seem beyond our control – from the weather to the economy, from other people's actions to our own circumstances. But here's the twist: while we might not have control over these external factors, we do have control over how we respond to them, how we perceive them, and ultimately, how we experience them.
Think of it like being handed a deck of cards in a game of poker. You can't control the cards you're dealt, but you can control how you play them. You can fold and lament your luck, or you can strategize, bluff, and make the most out of the hand you've got. Similarly, in life, you can either passively let external conditions dictate your experience, or you can actively shape your own narrative, turning obstacles into opportunities and challenges into catalysts for growth.
Consider the story of two people facing the same setback: losing their job. One sees it as a crushing defeat, wallowing in self-pity and blaming external circumstances for their misfortune. The other views it as a chance to pursue a new career path, to learn new skills, or even to start their own business. Same external condition, vastly different experiences – all because of how they chose to perceive and respond to it.
It's not about denying the existence of external conditions or pretending they don't matter. Of course, they do. But it's about recognizing that while we can't always change those conditions, we can always change how we relate to them. It's about reclaiming agency over our own lives, refusing to be mere passengers drifting with the currents of fate, and instead, becoming the captains of our own ships, steering towards the destinations we desire.
Picture a sculptor faced with a block of marble. The marble itself is inert, immutable – it's just a lump of stone. But in the hands of the sculptor, it becomes something more: a masterpiece waiting to be unveiled. With every strike of the chisel, the sculptor isn't merely shaping the marble; they're also shaping their own vision, bringing forth beauty from raw material. In much the same way, we can sculpt our lives, chiseling away at the rough edges of external conditions to reveal the beauty within.
So, the next time you find yourself confronted with challenging external conditions, ask yourself: How can I change my experience of this? How can I find opportunity within adversity? How can I wield my own agency to shape the outcome? Remember, while you might not always have control over the stormy seas, you always have control over the course you chart through them.
And now, I pose this question to you: What's one external condition in your life that you've been struggling with, and how might you change your experience of it?
* If you're looking for more inspiration to help you on your personal development journey, you may want to check out my extensive list of SMART goals. This page is packed with thousands of different goal ideas that can help you set new aspirations and reach higher heights in your life. Personally, this page helped me to create my own 100 life goals list, which I pursued for over a decade.
Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.