We put people on a pedestal to feel closer to them, whereas, it does the opposite – it creates a gap. Idealizing = living in ficion.
Have you ever found yourself looking up to someone, admiring them from afar, thinking they have it all together? Maybe it's a celebrity, a mentor, or even a friend who seems to have everything figured out. We often put these individuals on a pedestal, elevating them to a status above ourselves in an attempt to feel closer to them, to emulate their success or perceived perfection. But what if I told you that this pedestal we place them on actually creates a gap between us, rather than bringing us closer together?
Think of it like this: imagine you're standing at the base of a towering mountain, gazing up at its majestic peak. From where you stand, the summit seems like an unreachable dream, bathed in an aura of perfection and unattainability. You might idolize that mountain, marveling at its grandeur and beauty, but the reality is, the more you idealize it, the more distant it becomes.
In the same way, when we idealize people, we're essentially turning them into unreachable mountains in our minds. We paint them with qualities and attributes that seem flawless, forgetting that they too are human, flawed and imperfect, just like us. This idealization creates a barrier between us and them, a gap that widens with every unrealistic expectation we place upon them.
The danger of living in this realm of fiction, where we idealize others, is that we lose sight of their humanity. We forget that behind the polished facade lies a person with struggles, insecurities, and failures just like our own. We fail to see them for who they truly are, flaws and all, and instead, we cling to an illusion of perfection that ultimately leaves us feeling disconnected and disillusioned.
But what if we were to step down from our pedestal, to meet others on equal ground? What if we were to acknowledge their humanity, with all its complexities and imperfections, and recognize that we are all on this journey of life together, navigating its ups and downs as best we can? By doing so, we bridge the gap that idealization creates, forging genuine connections built on authenticity and empathy.
Imagine if, instead of idolizing the mountain, you were to climb it alongside others, sharing in the triumphs and challenges of the journey. You would no longer see it as an unattainable dream, but rather as a tangible goal, achievable through perseverance and solidarity. Similarly, when we see others as equals rather than idols, we realize that the summit of success is not reserved for the few, but open to all who are willing to put in the effort and support each other along the way.
So, the next time you find yourself placing someone on a pedestal, take a moment to pause and reflect. Ask yourself why you're idealizing them and what it says about your own insecurities and desires. And remember, true connection is not found in elevating others above ourselves, but in standing beside them as equals, embracing our shared humanity and lifting each other up along the journey of life.
In conclusion, let's strive to live authentically, free from the constraints of idealization. Let's tear down the pedestals we've erected in our minds and embrace the beauty of human connection in all its messy, imperfect glory. Only then can we truly experience the richness and depth of relationships that nourish our souls and bring meaning to our lives.
Now, reflect on a person you may have idealized in the past. What steps can you take to see them more authentically and build a genuine connection with them?
* To gain more inspiration and motivation for your personal growth journey, I recommend visiting my SMART goals page, which offers a wide range of goal ideas to help you establish new aspirations and achieve greater success in life. This list was crucial in the development of my own life goals list, consisting of 100 goals that I pursued for ten years.
Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.