Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
What's the meaning of this quote?
Quote Meaning: This quote encapsulates a profound wisdom about the nature of friendship and the importance of discretion in cultivating meaningful relationships. It suggests that the process of selecting friends should not be rushed, but rather approached with careful deliberation and discernment. Moreover, it emphasizes the value of loyalty and stability in friendships, advising against hasty decisions to sever or replace them.
At its core, the quote underscores the significance of the friendships we choose to nurture in our lives. Friends play a vital role in shaping our experiences, providing support, companionship, and understanding through life's myriad challenges and joys. Therefore, the decision to forge a bond with someone should not be taken lightly. Just as we exercise caution and thoughtfulness in other aspects of our lives, such as career choices or life partners, so too should we exercise prudence in selecting those with whom we share our deepest selves.
The first part of the quote, "Be slow in choosing a friend," speaks to the importance of patience and deliberation in the process of forming friendships. True friendship is built on a foundation of shared values, mutual respect, and genuine connection. Rushing into friendships without considering these essential factors can lead to disappointment or even harm. By taking the time to get to know someone, observing their character, and understanding their values, we increase the likelihood of cultivating friendships that are fulfilling and enduring.
The second part of the quote, "slower in changing," underscores the commitment and loyalty that should characterize our friendships once they are established. While it is natural for relationships to evolve over time, particularly as individuals grow and change, the quote advises against precipitous decisions to abandon or replace friends at the first sign of difficulty or disagreement. Instead, it encourages steadfastness and perseverance in maintaining and nurturing existing friendships, even in the face of challenges or differences.
In essence, this quote serves as a reminder of the profound impact that friendships can have on our lives and the importance of approaching them with care, thoughtfulness, and commitment. It urges us to be deliberate in our choice of friends, recognizing the significance of the bonds we form, and to be steadfast in our loyalty to those who have earned a place in our lives. By embracing these principles, we can cultivate relationships that enrich our experiences, provide support and companionship, and endure the test of time.
Who said the quote?
The quote "Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing." is often attributed to Benjamin Franklin (Bio / Quotes). Benjamin Franklin was an American statesman, writer, and inventor who played a key role in the founding of the United States.
What are Benjamin Franklin's Best Quotes?
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Is there a historical example that illustrates the message of the quote?
The quote "Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing" can be vividly illustrated by examining the relationship between President Franklin D. Roosevelt and his long-time advisor, Louis Howe, during the early 20th century.
Franklin D. Roosevelt, who would later become one of the most influential U.S. Presidents, faced a period of intense personal and political challenges when he contracted polio in 1921. At this crucial juncture, Louis Howe, a seasoned political strategist and journalist, became one of Roosevelt's closest allies. Howe, who had been a friend of Roosevelt’s since the 1910s, was instrumental in helping Roosevelt navigate his political ambitions despite his disability.
Howe’s unwavering support and strategic advice played a critical role in Roosevelt’s rise from a state senator to the Governor of New York and eventually to the presidency. Their friendship was characterized by Howe’s steadfast commitment to Roosevelt’s career and well-being. This relationship exemplifies the principle of being “slow in choosing a friend” because Roosevelt had carefully chosen Howe based on trust and shared values over many years.
However, the quote also underscores the importance of being “slower in changing” one’s friends. Despite facing political pressures and differing opinions during his presidency, Roosevelt remained loyal to Howe and maintained their friendship throughout Howe’s life. This loyalty was crucial not only to Roosevelt’s personal support system but also to his political strategy.
The steadfast nature of their relationship highlights the value of forming long-term, reliable friendships and the benefits of maintaining these connections even as circumstances evolve. By sticking with a trusted friend through thick and thin, Roosevelt demonstrated the strength and stability that such enduring relationships can provide.
How can the quote be applied in a real-life scenario?
In real life, the quote "Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing" can serve as a valuable guideline for personal and professional relationships.
When it comes to choosing friends, taking time to build and assess a relationship can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections. For instance, if you’re starting a new job and you meet many new colleagues, it’s wise to be cautious about whom you trust deeply. Building a friendship requires understanding, shared values, and mutual respect. Rushing into close friendships without fully understanding the person can lead to misunderstandings or conflicts. Instead, taking time to observe and interact with potential friends can help ensure that your relationships are based on genuine compatibility and trust.
In a professional context, this quote suggests that forming alliances or partnerships should be approached with care. For example, if you’re considering a business partnership, it’s important to thoroughly evaluate the other party’s values, goals, and track record before committing. This careful selection can prevent future conflicts and ensure a strong, cooperative relationship.
Once a friendship or professional relationship is established, being "slower in changing" reflects the importance of loyalty and commitment. Just as Roosevelt valued his long-time advisor despite changing circumstances, maintaining established relationships through challenging times can strengthen trust and support. For example, if you have a close friend who has supported you through various life changes, remaining committed to that friendship even when faced with disagreements or difficulties can be crucial. This loyalty reinforces the strength of the relationship and shows that you value and respect the bond you’ve built.
Overall, this quote emphasizes the importance of thoughtful consideration in forming relationships and the value of maintaining them with loyalty and perseverance. Whether in personal or professional realms, approaching relationships with care and commitment can lead to more fulfilling and enduring connections.
Applying the quote to your life
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Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.
