Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.
What's the meaning of this quote?
Quote Meaning: The quote "Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option" encapsulates a profound truth about relationships, respect, and self-worth. At its core, it emphasizes the importance of reciprocity and mutual regard in any meaningful connection.
In the context of relationships, whether they be romantic, platonic, or professional, the quote underscores the inherent imbalance when one person consistently prioritizes another who does not reciprocate that level of commitment or consideration. This situation often leads to feelings of neglect, disappointment, and even resentment for the person who consistently finds themselves relegated to the role of an option rather than a priority.
Fundamentally, it speaks to the need for equity in relationships. When one person consistently values another more than they are valued in return, it creates a lopsided dynamic where one party may end up feeling unappreciated or taken for granted. This imbalance can erode trust and self-esteem over time, as the person investing more may feel they are not receiving the respect or acknowledgment they deserve.
Moreover, the quote also carries a deeper message about self-respect and boundaries. It encourages individuals to recognize their own worth and not settle for relationships where they are not genuinely valued. Making someone a priority implies a significant investment of time, effort, and emotion. If this investment is not reciprocated by the other person, it can lead to emotional distress and a sense of unfulfillment.
From a practical standpoint, the quote advises individuals to assess the dynamics of their relationships honestly. It urges them to ensure that their efforts are met with similar enthusiasm and commitment from the other party. This reflection is crucial for maintaining healthy boundaries and fostering relationships that are balanced and mutually fulfilling.
Ultimately, the quote serves as a reminder of the importance of mutual respect and reciprocity in all relationships. It encourages individuals to prioritize their own well-being and emotional health by investing in connections where they are valued as much as they value others. By doing so, it promotes healthier relationships built on equality, understanding, and genuine appreciation.
Who said the quote?
The quote "Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option." is often attributed to Maya Angelou (Bio / Quotes). Maya Angelou was an American poet, author, and civil rights activist who is best known for her memoir "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.
Is there a historical example that illustrates the message of the quote?
Consider the story of Napoleon Bonaparte and his relationship with Josephine de Beauharnais. Napoleon, a man of immense ambition and drive, initially placed Josephine at the very center of his life. Their marriage was marked by deep affection, and Napoleon often expressed that Josephine was his greatest priority. However, as Napoleon’s power grew and his focus shifted towards his ambitions of empire and political stability, his feelings for Josephine became less central to his grand plans.
Despite the deep connection they once shared, Napoleon ultimately found himself in a position where he had to consider the political implications of his marriage. Josephine’s inability to produce an heir for Napoleon became a significant issue, given his desire to secure his dynasty. As a result, he chose to divorce her in 1810 to marry Marie-Louise of Austria, who could provide the heir Napoleon needed for his empire’s continuation.
In this scenario, Napoleon’s actions illustrate the idea of making someone a priority only when they are not merely an option. His devotion to Josephine was strong initially, but as his political needs evolved, he redefined his priorities based on his broader goals. Josephine, once a central figure in Napoleon’s life, became secondary to his political ambitions, highlighting how priorities can shift when broader objectives come into play.
How can the quote be applied in a real-life scenario?
Imagine a situation in a workplace where an employee, Alex, is deeply committed to supporting and working extra hours for their manager, Jamie. Alex frequently goes above and beyond, often staying late and taking on extra responsibilities to ensure Jamie’s projects succeed. However, despite Alex’s dedication, Jamie consistently overlooks Alex’s contributions and fails to recognize their efforts, offering little in return.
In this scenario, Alex might be making Jamie a priority, putting in substantial effort and energy, while Jamie sees Alex more as an option—someone to rely on when convenient, but not as someone central to their own professional development or success. This imbalance can lead to frustration and dissatisfaction for Alex, who may eventually realize that their dedication isn’t being reciprocated or valued in the way they hoped.
Applying the quote means recognizing when your own efforts and commitment are not matched by the significance you hold in someone else’s life or priorities. If you find yourself consistently placing someone or something at the center of your attention, while they view you as just one of many options, it may be worth reassessing your priorities. In real life, this could involve setting boundaries, seeking reciprocal relationships, or realigning your focus to ensure that your commitment is valued and respected. The essence of the quote is about balancing the importance of your own needs and expectations with how you are treated by others, aiming for relationships and situations where mutual respect and consideration are upheld.
Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.
