When befriended, remember it; when you befriend, forget it.
What's the meaning of this quote?
Quote Meaning: The essence of the quote lies in the dynamics of friendship, encapsulating a profound truth about human relationships. Let's delve into its layers to unravel its meaning.
"When befriended, remember it": This phrase reminds us of the significance of acknowledging and cherishing the friendships we are fortunate enough to have. It emphasizes gratitude and recognition for the bonds that enrich our lives. When someone extends their friendship to us, whether through gestures of kindness, support, or shared experiences, it's crucial to acknowledge and appreciate their presence. Remembering the generosity and warmth shown by others fosters a sense of gratitude, strengthening the bond between friends. It also serves as a reminder of the interconnectedness of human beings, highlighting the importance of reciprocity and acknowledging the positive impact others have on us.
On the other hand, "when you befriend, forget it" introduces an intriguing contrast. This part of the quote suggests adopting a selfless approach to friendship. It encourages us to let go of any expectations or attachments to the kindness we extend to others. When we befriend someone, we should do so without dwelling on it or expecting anything in return. True friendship transcends transactional interactions; it's about genuine connection and unconditional support. By forgetting our acts of kindness towards others, we liberate our friendships from the constraints of obligation or indebtedness. This attitude fosters a sense of freedom and authenticity within relationships, allowing them to flourish naturally.
Together, these two parts of the quote offer a balanced perspective on friendship. Remembering the kindness we receive from others cultivates gratitude and strengthens bonds, while forgetting the favors we do for others fosters selflessness and authenticity in our relationships. It reminds us that friendship is a two-way street, built on mutual respect, appreciation, and genuine connection. By embodying both aspects of this wisdom, we can cultivate deeper, more fulfilling relationships in our lives.
Who said the quote?
The quote "When befriended, remember it; when you befriend, forget it." is often attributed to Benjamin Franklin (Bio / Quotes). Benjamin Franklin was an American statesman, writer, and inventor who played a key role in the founding of the United States.
What are Benjamin Franklin's Best Quotes?
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Is there a historical example that illustrates the message of the quote?
A historical example that vividly illustrates the quote "When befriended, remember it; when you befriend, forget it" is the relationship between Franklin D. Roosevelt and Winston Churchill during World War II.
Franklin D. Roosevelt and Winston Churchill first met in 1941, during a tumultuous period when Britain was standing alone against the Axis powers. Churchill, who had recently become Prime Minister, found himself in a precarious position, desperately seeking support from the United States. Roosevelt, understanding the gravity of the situation and the strategic importance of aiding Britain, extended his support. This was a critical gesture of friendship and aid, representing a moment when Churchill was deeply in need.
Churchill never forgot the importance of Roosevelt's support. The American president’s decision to provide crucial assistance through programs like Lend-Lease was not merely a diplomatic maneuver but a lifeline to the British. Churchill's gratitude was immense and enduring, always remembering Roosevelt's role in helping his country during a dire period.
However, the quote suggests that when one is the benefactor, as Roosevelt was, it is vital to set aside any expectation of reward or recognition. Roosevelt, despite being aware of the impact of his support, did not dwell on it. His focus remained on the broader goal of defeating the Axis powers and fostering international cooperation. He continued to befriend Churchill, working collaboratively to secure victory and to plan for a post-war world without placing undue emphasis on the recognition he might receive.
In essence, Roosevelt's approach demonstrated the principle of the quote: when you are in the position to offer help, do so without expecting anything in return or allowing that expectation to influence your actions. The focus should remain on the act of aiding rather than on the acknowledgment of one's generosity.
How can the quote be applied in a real-life scenario?
The quote "When befriended, remember it; when you befriend, forget it" can be applied in many real-life scenarios, particularly in personal and professional relationships.
Imagine you are a manager in a company, and one of your team members goes out of their way to help you with a significant project. They stay late, put in extra effort, and ensure the project's success. This act of support is something you should remember with gratitude. Acknowledging their contribution and expressing your appreciation can strengthen your relationship and foster a positive work environment. This remembrance might come into play when considering their future career growth or recognizing their efforts in performance reviews.
On the other hand, if you are the one offering help—perhaps you mentor a junior employee or provide significant support to a colleague—it is crucial to focus on the act of helping rather than expecting anything in return. You should offer your support selflessly, without holding expectations of special treatment or recognition. By doing so, you ensure that your actions are driven by genuine intention rather than a desire for reward. This approach fosters a culture of altruism and respect, where the primary focus is on the well-being and growth of others rather than personal gain.
In personal relationships, the same principle applies. If a friend supports you during a tough time, cherish and remember their support. Show your gratitude through appreciation and reciprocation when appropriate. Conversely, when you offer support to friends or loved ones, do so with the intention of helping, not with the expectation of any particular response or recognition. By embracing this approach, you contribute to more genuine and fulfilling relationships, where actions are motivated by care and kindness rather than by the anticipation of reward.
Applying the quote to your life
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Chief Editor
Tal Gur is an author, founder, and impact-driven entrepreneur at heart. After trading his daily grind for a life of his own daring design, he spent a decade pursuing 100 major life goals around the globe. His journey and most recent book, The Art of Fully Living, has led him to found Elevate Society.
